My heart felt like it was getting squeezed

I do job placement. Sometimes people call our company and ask about our services. Sometimes no one is at the office but me so I answer these calls:
"Can you explain your services to me? Well, I have a daughter that I am afraid is making the wrong choice going to college for music and theater." (At this moment, Laura's chest begins to implode) "Do you discuss career choices with people?"

If you don't know me, yes, I majored in Spanish with a business minor, but my "real" major was ART. That's not even the point. I can't begin to explain the emotions going on here. I grew up with two parents who were 100%, vocally anyway, supportive of my TOTALLY DIFFERENT PERSONALITY AND GOALS/VISIONS THAN THE REST OF THE FAMILY. At one point I thought one was scared that I'd be a starving artist, which is a "valid" "fear." But, this "fear" wasn't vocalized (I could be making assumptions here) and I wasn't stopped from going out and making my own choices and learning, A LOT, from the choices I made that were not forced or even really influenced by my parents. That's not accurate. They were influenced by my parents in as much as they were supportive of me throughout my life, so I felt that any choice I was making was legitimate and that I'd have their love and support. Am I wrong? No, I still have both their love and support. Ahhhh! Anyway, I digress.

Laura: "Oh, well, I don't know, but I have two cousins who are going to school, one for music and the other for theater, actually, and they are really happy."

Lady: "What are they doing with that?"

Laura: "Well they're in school. The theater major is interested in more of the directing aspect, like directing children's theaters. The music major is thinking of not just playing music but also going into more of the business aspect of it."

Lady: "Oh, well..." (Then I realized I didn't actually answer her question, oops, that ol' damn ego again).

Laura: "So no, we are a placement agency that works with Rehab--people with disabilities--we don't have that service. My best advice would be to talk to someone in Career Services at the college she is going to."

The rest is a blur because, as I alluded to with the title, I thought I was going to implode and then blow up and all my inside juices would really make a mess in my office. So then I just said to myself that I need to settle and just send positive energies to that poor young woman who I am sure is so talented!

Maybe what I should have told the lady is that when I graduated with an Art and Spanish major/business minor and got a regular, FT, corporate job that I suffered from anxiety and depression because all my life force was being siphoned out of me all because that's "what people do when they have a college degree." Is that what she wants for her daugher?

Doubt it--she's just concerned. Now I've wasted way too much energy on the negetivity of the day. It is FRIDAY! Wooo Hooooo!!! Earth Day Half Marathon tomorrow... wish me luck!!

Love and Light to all those folks, young and old, who are wise enough to know that no matter what you try to do or where you try to go, you're never going to get there until you follow you dreams!
And compassion to those who haven't understood us yet.

Weekend Work

I didn't say it wasn't a good time... But it was certainly work... Bill made them, we both worked the soil... still a way to go...

Outside Garden

Can't give much credit to Bill, here... but he did help me move the seedlings from the floor to the table... he was outside moving Earth when I was propigating... Or, was I helping the seeds to propigate? Hmmm.

Inside Garden - Future Outside Garden

I am so excited!! We are doing so many things. Restate - we are trying so many things!! Kale and lettuce and onions and peppers and eggplant and tomatoes and chilis and collards and pole beans and carrots and spinach and sweet potatoes even, and chives and oregano and tarragon and thyme and cilantro/coriander and parsley and more and ohhh I love the Earth!! All the wonderful yumminess! We'll see how much yumminess we get from all this!

WWJD?

Ah! I was just told that if I wanted to apply for a position as a yoga teacher at a new wellness center opening in September of '09, that I can't bring any "New Age," or "Buddhism," into the practice. It's so funny how it went down, too, because I was going to call her about teaching private sessions through there. They don't even have a space for yoga classes. Well, maybe they'll get space, who knows. Anyway, beside the point. She's looking for a Christ-Centered yoga teacher, so if anyone knows of any in the St Cloud Area, please tell me and I'll hook them up. I'm good at hooking people up, apparently, just ask Julie A. Anyway, while talking to her I just mentioned that Jesus is AWESOME, but I can't be exclusive because the God we worship, to me, is the same God all spiritualities and religions worship. So although I don't deny Jesus in my personal spirituality, I can't exclude other practices. Then I came to writing this blog, though I don't know why it seems so important - must be that ego thing again - drat - and I wrote WWJD? in the subject line. Actually, I think it's pretty fitting. Answer me this: Can you see Jesus Christ teaching Yoga that is centered only on himself? I think we so easily forget that Jesus taught unconditional Love and Compassion for all. I think we even more easily forget that Jesus wasn't the founder of Christianity. Ah, anyway, I truly mean no disrespect. In fact, a Christ-centered yoga is probably much needed around these conservative Catholic parts. And they are still getting a slice of Yoga, from which they can follow the path of their choice. It really doesn't matter, they all lead to the same thing. All is One.
LOVE~

Flood Warning Statement

This is that last sentence on the river flood warnings for Minnesota on Weatherchannel.com. So nice.

DO NOT DRIVE CARS THROUGH FLOODED AREAS. TURN AROUND... DON'T DROWN.

Nothing to say

I don't really have anything to say. Tonight after class, the first time EVER (for yoga, not me) student that was there looked, acted, and sounded like I did after my first class ever. This doesn't mean the student actually felt like I did, but described it that way. In this I have much joy. I teach to help others find what I did. Then again, just feeling like I did after my first class doesn't mean anyone would find in him-/herself what I have found in myself--my Self. I suppose I'm not done teaching. Thank goodness - it's the first job I've had that doesn't make me feel like I am wasting my Prana! Well, I guess that was something to say. My ego is done talking for now, though. It's sort of refreshing.

work

Somehow I found myself brushing my teeth and looking into the sink and saying to myself, "Holy shit, I'm going to work!" in disbelief. It's Saturday, and phrase and disbelief is in no way negatory. I went to teach a Yoga 101 for Runners workshop with my friend Beth. It's the second one we've done and it looks like at least one more is in the works. Okay, so I'm not living off it, yet, but this is my JOB! Side note: Also in the works is my and Bill's adventure company where we take people backpacking and yoga-ing. So, someday maybe we will live on the North Shore. Then we'll do "mini" trips there and of course we'll do at least one or two "big" trips, like to Alaska, Hawaii, New Mexico, the Andes, a year. So, anyone want to sign up?? :)

Quotable and Lovable all at once.

"Well, I don't plan on spooning with men."
_Bill
Two minutes later, to "friend," Joe, over the phone:
"Yeah I'll take off my pants."

ALL DAY

I've been on computer pretty much ALL DAY working on *this* and formatting pictures in photoshop to be able to put a slide show on there....only to discover, alas, I can't. Or at least I don't know how because it's not an option along with insert: photo, video, flash, music, etc...
Julie A, can I put a slide show on there? Can you help me if I can?

Okay, love you all!!